I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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