I should be sponsored by Trojan
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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