From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
