The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
You dont lie about slip and slides
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
