i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize