Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
