champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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