we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize