dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
