I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
