Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize