I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
