I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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