fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize