i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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