My hand turned me down
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
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