Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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