Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Randomize