No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
