your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
