you would pick up someone in the library
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize