I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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