white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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