A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
