I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize