he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
