Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize