...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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