is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize