Welp...herpes.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
