her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
