Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
