To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
