Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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