I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
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