I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
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No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize