someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
