I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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