We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
i think i just lost a toe
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
