Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
