Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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