addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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