whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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