ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
