Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
