the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
