we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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