hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
