Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
