hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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