she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I'm sobbing to NWA
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
